Growing Boobs

There's so many things about pregnancy that no one tells you, or even better, that they tell you but you don't believe. Like your boobs getting bigger. Sure, they'll get bigger I thought. But seriously, how big can they get?

Porn stars have paid thousands for the breasts I currently have because of these babies. And now people are telling me they're just going to keep going.

I was never small chested. I started the pregnancy as a 34 DDD in Victoria's Secret U.S. sizing, so bras were already a challenge. Well, add some baby hormones and suddenly I'm almost off the charts and look like a pregnant Jessica Rabbit (assuming she was 5'4" and wore leggings a lot).

Miranda Kerr post baby. Kill me. 

Now try to find nursing bras to fit large melons. Good freaking luck. Apparently all the women in the world who have ever had babies or planned on breastfeeding started out as perky B cups and swelled to a C cup that somehow defies gravity and doesn't require an underwire.

All you people are assholes.

And why doesn't Victoria's Secret make nursing bras. Isn't it now a requirement for the Angels to pop
out a baby three weeks before the runway show and then walk in next to nothing on live television, pointing out to the whole world how they have superhuman genetics?

Luckily, a friend tipped me off to Cake Lingerie, who not only has nursing bras that have support and under wires, but they come in amazingly large sizes like E, F and G. And by amazingly large I mean sizes that fit me.

Recently Zulily had a sale on Cake Lingerie, and I jumped at the chance to buy one of their bras on sale to give it a try. I got a 36 E. I mean seriously, how far up the alphabet are we going to go?

The bra arrived the other day, and I'm pretty sure it can double as a parachute for a child in emergency situations. I tried it on and the fit is great. The band fits well and the cups are soft and fold down easily. It also has an underwire for a little added support.

My Cake nursing bra. Cute and functional. 

The best part? It doesn't look like a nursing bra. Nothing about it says "I'm a milk machine and these are my udders." Husband was even impressed when I modeled it for him, commenting on how well it fit and how not ugly it was.

Well shit, there was a problem I didn't forsee. It fit. Now. And I'm 23 weeks. If everyone is right then my breasts still have some more growing to do. That means I should have gotten an F or a G.Thank god someone makes that or I'd just have to tape them up and leave openings at the nipples.